Posted: Jul 27 2015
I am a full time boss for the first time in my life. While I find it extremely fulfilling to teach, share, and work together, I am constantly considering how my reactions and actions affect others. More than anything, I want the BURU culture to be one of purpose, positivity and encouragement. I know I don't always get it right - but there is a haunting voice that runs through my brain to keep me on track. The voice of my first female boss.
I was 21, fresh out of college and let's face it, pretty clueless as to the ways of the corporate world. I was working in design (interior design at the time actually) which allows for a touch of creative flare when it comes to work style. I wouldn't say I took advantage of the policy, but I didn't wear a black Theory suit everyday either. Though I don't recall many of my exact outfits from the fall of 2002, there is one that I will never forget.
White BCBG button down man shirt + Grey wool cropped Theory pants + Red single sole, pointy toe heels from Top Shop (I had just returned from London and was SUPER proud of them).
I walked into the office that day feeling professional and put together. My boss was out for the morning, but we were meeting for lunch with our entire team of 8. Throughout the morning, I receive many compliments on my red pumps - so you can imagine my surprise when I walked into our lunch meeting and boss lady loudly said (in front of the entire team, in addition to a VP), "Wow, I thought red shoes were for reserved for whores and children." Clearly, I was not the latter, so I think it's obvious what she was implying.
I was stunned; I was embarrassed; and as a much more sensitive 21 year old, I was hurt. I could feel tears welling up, but I didn't want her to get the best of me so I did the only thing I knew to do - I laughed.
The story may seem trivial, but to me it is a constant reminder of how not to be a #girlboss. I would like to believe snide comments and jabs are happening less and less, but watching Working Girl over the weekend has me wondering. Whether it stems from insecurity or competitiveness, who knows, but women tearing down other women in the work place (or in any place for that matter) is just plain gross.
Wouldn't life be a little sweeter if we used that energy to build each other up? Perhaps we would even have a female president by now if we would...
Have you ever been #girlboss bullied? Please do share...
Very opposite to mothering and I am constantly reminding myself of that! Once a mother, always a mother I suppose.