Posted: May 18 2015
Last week, Brett and I had a come to Jesus talk about the state of our dating life. Between parenting Olive, running BURU, moving cross country, renovating a new house, and managing a new career on Brett's end - we are mentally exhausted. So exhausted that on our last dinner date, to one of the most delicious restaurants in SLC, I found myself asking the waitress if she could rush the final course. I literally feared I might face plant into my plate if it didn't arrive in the next few moments.
This broke my heart. Why would I ever want fast forward through "just the two of us" time? It's so precious. It's so important.
On the way home, I brought it up. I felt so guilty that I rushed us, that I rushed him. He laughed. It was a laugh of relief. He felt exactly as I did. Tired. Beaten down. Ready for jammies and trash TV. In an instant, I felt so much better. And then, I felt so much worse. He was rushing the dinner too?! How depressing. What happened to us? We used to be the last table standing, closing restaurants down left and right. So engrossed in our conversation, that we lost track of time. Extending the length of every meal by studying the menu together for a slow ordering process, complete with numerous courses, cheese plates and port to cap off the night.
Was it time for me to realize that this particular phase of life might be over or at least on serious pause during the "toddler years"? I mean we really can't do it all. Somethings do have to give. But your marriage shouldn't be one of them.
We started chatting about our options and quickly discovered that we were giving the best parts of ourselves to everyone else but each other. We hustle in the mornings to get Olive fed, cleaned, dressed and out the door. We give work our all during the bulk of the day. We focus fully on Little Bee when we all arrive home for play time, dinner time, story time and bedtime. And then, after all that, when Olive is finally asleep, we focus on each other.
In the midst of our conversation, we started reminiscing on some of our favorites dates. A few that popped to the top of the list were actually brunch dates (during our pre-Olive days). And then it hit us...like a ton of bricks sent down from Captain Obvious. No more date nights for us (not for a little while anyway). We are bringing back the pre-kid (sans kid) Day Date!
And as much as we don't want to give up weekend time with Olive, we know that we need time to be Brett and Morgan, not just Olive's parents.
We tested out our plan this past Saturday. After a fun-filled morning of tea parties and puzzles with Olive, we headed up the mountain (in an Uber. NO need to ever tempt yourself to drink and drive!) to the Montage for a champagne lunch at Apex. It started snowing on our way up which made for a romantic ride and the perfect excuse to make s'mores around the fire after lunch. Who knew what a aphrodisiac lunching in the light of day with your husband (and without your toddler) could be!
Long live the Day Date!