Real MOM Monday: I Suck at Potty Training
When we decided to move cross country with a toddler, we immediately put the potty-training on hold. Everyone in Olive's life from teachers to her pediatrician to grandparents and friends agreed that this was a smart idea. In fact, we felt great encouragement to do so.
Well...our little lady in potty-training waiting seems to have become very attached to her diaper, and I feel that we waited too long. A little girl who was once excited about big girl panties covered in "Sophia the First" now tells me, "I fine. I pee-pee in my diaper". She has no desire or motivation to say goodbye to the diaper. She also doesn't seemed bothered by a leaky pull-up or wet panties (the times that we have attempted wearing them). I never dreamed that a child who wants to change clothes if she gets the tiniest drop of water on her dress would tolerate a soggy diaper.
Naturally, I am now blaming myself for this set back. It's not that she is incredibly behind children her age or that I am even bogged down with comparing other children's potty progress to hers. It's because every single mom friend has told me the importance of consistency - and well, I am giving her zero of that. And it's not just the move - it's that every time we start to get in a groove, it is time for another trip to the airport and for the sake of selfish convenience, I put her in a pull-up or even a regular diaper for long flights. How confusing this must be for her?
Over the weekend, I thought we were making some progress. Rewards of jelly beans seemed to be doing the trick and we even moved her little potty to the family room so she could try to pee-pee while watching the original Annie (a new obsession). And then...this happened.
That's right. Poop. Lots of poop...in the bathtub. Happy Mother's Day to me. My gag reflux never settled down after pregnancy, so naturally I gagged myself right into actually throwing up. Olive proceeded to turn out the light in the W.C., slam the door, and say, "See you later Alligator!". Mommy fail. And the worst part, she was completely unphased. Sweet little thing did apologize (sincerity lacking) and I think it is highly likely that this will happen again.
I know that this happens to almost every child, but I am at a loss of what to do. Is there any luck in the potty-training game or is the ball 100% in my court to make Olive want to poop and pee in the potty?
As I type this, Olive is wrapping up her first day at school wearing big girl panties. I packed 3 extra outfits for her. I fear that I will still arrive to a "pantsless" child who thinks that I played a prank on her. Pretty sure we will be hitting up the ice cream parlor for a mom guilt treat. Stay tuned for how she did. If she in fact nailed it and made it through the day sans accident, should I feel proud that my efforts paid off or sad that she refuses to pee in the potty for me? The truth is that I just want her to be a happy adjusted kid with dry pants. However that happens. I will take it.
Any tips mamas? Anyone feeling the same way?
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Oh, we had the same sort of regression scenario. It helped us to take a break and re-approach. Then we were rigidly consistent and went straight to underwear starting with bathroom breaks every half an hour regardless of whether or not he said he had to go and then tapering out from there. There were a lot of tears from all involved, but after a few weeks, we were in the clear and had stretched out to bathroom breaks every hour. I will say that school helped A LOT – nothing like a little peer pressure to reinforce the potty. Other than that, I’d recommend a lot of deep breaths, clorox, and wine. You’ll get through it – you’ve never seen a non-potty trained adult ;)
Haute Child in the City
Too funny! Although, I’m sure it’s not as funny to you! :) This will just be one of those times of life you can look back on and chuckle over with the, “remember when…?”. You’re a wonderful mother Morgan, so proud of you…and your ability to maintain your humor in the frustrating, daily grind helps remind me to always keep a positive, humor-filled outlook on everyday life as well.
morgan, for some reason… I have not stressed about potty training! Elle turned 3 last August and has just started pooping in potty without a comPlete breakdown! It took months of asking and she even was at a point of holding it in to keep from going! I finally decided that it would happen at some point in the near future and it will for olive too! I feel like it’s different for each child. She goes now and doesn’t even tell me?. She still wears pull-ups at night time and I often wonder how long this will take. It will all work out! Don’t blame yourself. She may not be ready!
Kelly ray on